Why I suffered so much in my life ???? Session is written and shared by subject who regressed ...
Session
I saw myself as an 8 years old golden hair boy looking at sky and playing with a kite , i started feeling uneasy feeling a dark shadow behind me. He was my guardian, a black farm manager who had come to take me from the fields, to take me back to the farm. I was not related to him and i was raised by him on a farm located in Mexico.
Then I saw myself at the age of 15 wearing brown cowboy pants, it felt like I was not an obedient child anymore, I was not still helping the black guy in any way and i was just living on that farm with them, it took me a lot of effort to reach the event that had affected me, it was in Mexico city, i was 17 years old and i was standing at a corner , smoking ,I i could sense that i was a guy that people feared and if they talked to me or called me it was because of my fearless and mischievous behaviour and not out of true respect, next i heard the black guy calling me from behind by my name , he said “ hey Bob”, and before I could turn my head fully , he hit me with a sharp edged weapon in the head , I cld feel the pain but not see the blood and i kept telling Dr.Vandana that there is no blood, I was taken to a nursing home where i was treated. after this point everything was blank and i could not progress further, would lose Dr’s directions however finally i moved to another chapter, at this point i was a 28 yrs old man , tall with brown hair, wore good clothes, married with 2 kids and I knew I was in New York city .
By now i knew i was of Italian origin and had now settled in new york, i was short tempered, did not respect my wife, did not love her though i was attached to her and i was a chain smoker which I kept on telling Dr.Vandana” I smoke alot, I smoke alot”.
Dr.Vandana asked me what did u do ? and I said i was always at home , I only ordered, i no more worked and remained home most of the times as now iihad people work for me , and she asked what do they do for you ? I answered they bring me the money, i am the Mafia Don .
She asked me if i ever killed anyone and i did not want to answer, i said Ii no more kill and i only order my people to kill. She asked me why did i stay home and i answered to protect my family.
She asked me again if i killed many people but i did not answer and i could not progress, i said i am very short tempered, i dont like my wife, women are good for nothing, they are only there to reproduce and they can do nothing in life. My wife’s name was Mary, she was my mom-( in real life)-.
I had an assistant who took care of everything , namely Billy..This man is a friend in real life , someone who played a very major role in my today’s misery. I told Dr.Vandana that billy is the guy who would take care of the business after me.
She asked my why i did not love my wife but i did not say anything and again went into a discomfort mode. After sometime Dr.Vandana asked me to move ahead in that life and then i was on the street, shot in the right knee and in the right side of the stomach, it was a shoot out of two gangs and i was shot, Billi took me to a place where I felt i stayed for 3 months to recover from the wounds. My knee healed however my stomach remained infectious throughout life, interesting is that exactly at the age of 34 I started to have this knee problem/ injury where after many tests and MRIs doctors are still not sure what did cause it and asked me not to have any physical activity that would put stress on my knee for 6-9 months but more interesting is the wound on the right side of the stomach.I have a birth mark exactly at the same place. It is amazing how we carry even the physical pain with us.
When i further progressed in my past life as Don Bob, i saw myself at home, and suddenly i was hauling, the feeling of loss was so intense that i was shaking and crying , when Dr. Asked me to explain why i was crying i told her that my wife had sent both my sons to billy, as she thought they were more safe with him ...I could never forgive my wife for this act.
The next scene was that my wife was packing her suitcase and wanted to leave, i did not stop her, i let her go. Dr.vandana asked me to see where she was and i saw her in a house where women with no family and support were taken care of , she died a lonely death there at maybe 34 and my younger son was the only person present at her funeral.
Next Dr.Vandana asked me to see where my sons were and i could see that they were with billy , now young men, my elder son was a very cruel and shrewd man , a bad soul with scary eyes , he happened to be the closest person to me in this life who actually ruined my life and my younger son was aloof , he was not happy being there.
After this i cld not progress further so Dr.Vandana asked me to go back to childhood again , there i came to know how i had landed up living with the black guy, i was 3 years old walking with my mom and dad on the street and i was lost around noon, and by evening when no one came to take me ,the black guy he took me to that farm and raised me, at this point i knew why he hit me at the age of 17, i had become popular and the farm owner had asked me to take care of the farm and had put him out of job and jealousy was the reason for his action. This guy too has played a very major role in my today’s problems. By now i knew who he was.
At this point Dr.Vandana asked me again if i ever killed anyone and i said 4-5 maybe and i killed the black guy too. It felt as if i felt the black guy and his action lead me to becoming a don as after i killed him in a state of revenge i had to turn away and eventually i turned to a Don, i felt he was responsible for polluting my soul and it is so amazing i feel the same about the person in my real life, i feel he is the cause of me taking a very wrong decision and i have been tricked to a situation that i never wanted to be in.
The next scene was when my elder son he came home, he was furious, he wanted to kill me as he thought and believed i had sent his mom away and was responsible for his death, i explained to him that she was not happy and she herself left the house, showed him the cupboard that she had taken all her belongings, he calmed down and left, at this moment i told Dr. That i did not like him and he was a bad soul, he had killed many people and was cruel , she asked me why didnt i like my elder son and finally i told the secret that he was not my son, he was my wife’s and billy’s son and i felt i never told this to my son as i did not want him to hate his mother. Interesting is t fact that the mother of the same person in my real life had ran away with her lover after marriage and then was brought back home.
Dr.Vandana asked me if i had relations with any other women and i refused very clearly. I was asked to go to the time of death , i saw myself as 75 years old who was very weak due to excessive smoking and the wound in the stomach. I was trying to turn off the light when i fell and died, my body was there for 7 days and was eventually recovered by neighbours and police came to take my body, i was not leaving the place till my body was taken care of.
Doctor asked my what colour light i was and my answer was that i was a grey powder, she asked me to move on and go into the white light but i told her i wanted to go back , i had some work, she told me to go back and finish it and i went back to see my younger son , i saw him and gave him my blessings and it is after that that i cld move up and above, it was a great struggle to go to the white light , Dr.Vandana being a healer as well pushed me with her techniques and eventually i reached the white light , it was magical and peaceful, i feel i rested there for 7 years.
